The Drunken cat and the possessed pen!_episode 68

Missy arrives home with Jason. She walks over to a sleeping Francis.

Missy: Hey there kitty!
Cat (slurring his words): What do you want? Let me sleep…

Missy: I just thought that you´d like to know that I brought Amelia with me and that she´s outside.

Francis´s eyes open wide and he looks at Missy.

Cat: what? Where?
Missy: Not only that, I saw a really cute cat outside making his way to her as I walked by.

Jason: why are you telling him those things?
Missy (looks at Jason): well because…

Missy looks back at Francis only to find him gone.

Missy: where did he go?
Jason: Where do you think?

Missy flashes Jason a knowing smile.

Jason rolls his eyes and walks away.

Jason: If my cat comes home bleeding again, you´re the one who´ll be taking him to the vet this time.

Missy: Oh please! That cat can talk his way out of anything.
Jason: what?


Francis comes outside into his backyard, and as Missy had suggested, he finds Amelia talking to another cat.

Cat: Cough, Cough…

Amelia: Hello Francis.
Cat: Hello Amelia, dear.
Amelia: Francis this is Ricardo.

Ricky: Please dear, call me Ricky.
Amelia: Ricky! My bad.
Ricky: No worries dear.

Cat: It’s nice to meet you Ricky, I´m Francis.
Ricky: The name is Ricardo. Only my friends call me Ricky.

Cat: Okay. You do know you´re trespassing, right?
Ricky: I beg your pardon?
Amelia (interrupting, before Francis can answer): Francis don´t be ridiculous! You´re being rude!

Cat: How am I being rude? He´s on my property, hitting on my girlfriend!

Ricky looks back and forth between Amelia and Francis.

Ricky: Say what? You and this lovely kitten? You´re talking nonsense aren´t you?
Cat: I have no idea what the hell you just barked, but get of my property!

Amelia (angry): Francis!
Cat: what? He started it!

Amelia: Please ignore him. He was raised on a barn.
Cat: No I wasn´t!

Ricky: That´s alright dear. I have to get going anyways. It was an absolute pleasure to meet you my darling.

Amelia (giggling): oh the pleasure was mine.

Ricky: Good day.
Cat: yeah, bye!

Ricky exits the backyard leaving Amelia alone with Francis.

Amelia: Francis! That was so rude of you!
Cat: I was rude? I said “Hello!” and he nearly bit my head off!

Amelia just stares at him, mad.

Cat (mocking): “The name is Ricardo. Only my friends call me Ricky.”
Amelia: Oh Francis. You´re being ridiculous!

Cat: Right! I´m being ridiculous! But when Bianca was here you were the one who got crazy jealous!

Amelia: I did not get jealous!
Cat: No, just crazy!
Amelia: what did you just say?

Cat: Nothing! (changing the subject) Anyways, who´s the cat?
Amelia: That was Ricky. He just moved here. He lives on the house at the end of the street.
Cat: good to know.

Amelia: why?
Cat: So I can warn Raul and Rafael.
Amelia: who?

Cat: The Bird and the Rat.
Amelia: why?

Cat: because there´s a new cat in the neighborhood and they need to be cautious.
Amelia: why do you care?

Cat: because they´re my friends.
Amelia: you need to get new friends!
Cat: what I need is to get a new girlfriend.

Francis walks away, leaving Amelia dumbstruck.

Amelia:  What?

The end!

2017_Joana Teixeira


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