The Drunken cat and the possessed pen!_episode 57

Francis, the cat is hiding in Jason´s room, under his bed.

The Pen comes along.

Pen (grinning): Francis!

The cat feels a cold chill go from the tip of his tail to the top of his head.

Cat (screaming): Ah!
Pen: Ha! HA! Ha! I swear, this never gets old.
Cat (whispering): Demonic Pen, this is not the moment.

Pen: why not? And why are you whispering?
Cat: Can´t you see I´m hiding?
Pen: I swear I have never met a cat as big of a coward as you. Who are you hiding from this time?

Cat: Doesn´t matter, go away!
Pen (smiling): Kitty, who are you HIDING from?
Cat: No one, leave me alone.

Pen: No!
Cat (exhales in annoyance): Fine! If you must know, I´m hiding from Tiffany.
Pen: May I ask who Tiffany is?
Cat: she´s the devil´s spawn.

Pen: Oh, I see.
Cat: See what?
Pen: You´re afraid of a child.

Cat: she´s probably your sister. You know, demonic and all.
Pen: Sorry, no. I don´t have any sisters.
Cat: you sure about that? Because she twice as annoying as you are.
Pen (pissed):  Oh no she´s not!

Cat: How can you tell? You´ve never met her.
Pen: Well, because. I´m the all amazing and wonderful pen.
Cat: You´re hell-bent on annoying me, that´s what you are!

Pen: See? I´m the all amazing devilish Pen.
Cat: seriously? You´re upset that a little girl is more obnoxious than you?
Pen: Yes. What can I say? I like to be first place in everything.
Cat: everything?

Pen: Maybe not everything, but if I can be the one who annoys you the most then I´ve fulfilled my lifelong mission.
Cat: You truly are demented.
Pen: Anyways, who is Tiffany, aside from being insufferable?
Cat: she´s Jason´s niece. She´s four and she´s a pest.

Pen: She´s not here now. Why are you so on edge? What did she do to you?
Cat (looking to the side): Nothing!
Pen: Kitty?

Because the room is dark and the door is closed, no light is shining into the room. The Pen can´t take a good look at Francis.

Pen: I´ll tell you what, I´ll go check outside if she´s there and I´ll let you know, okay?
Cat: yeah, okay. Thanks Pen.

The Pen disappears for a moment.

Cat: what´s taking you so long?
Pen: Francis?

Francis jumps and knocks his head on the bed.

Cat: Au! Crap! That hurt!
Pen: Ha! Ha! Ha…
Cat: You did that on purpose, didn´t you?
Pen: Of course I did. You can come out now.

Cat: You sure?
Pen: Yes, come out.

Francis comes out from underneath the bed, still fearful, looking to the sides.

The Pen takes one good look at the cat and bursts out laughing.

Pen: Ha! Ha! Ha! Oh god! NO… this is too much!
Cat: Stop laughing you stupid stick!
Pen (barely speaking from laughing so hard): she… sprayed your tail with pink glitter…
Cat: shut up!

Pen: No… I can´t! You have a red bow on you head, and Oh god. You look absolutely adorable!
Cat: you´re enjoying this way too much!
Pen: oh, you bet I am!

Francis is incredibly pissed off.

Cat: I really hate you!
Pen: Now you truly look like a princess.
Cat: Pen from hell, I´m a boy!

Pen: You sure? Because to me, you look like princess kitten, a gigantic kitten, but one none the less. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Cat: Keep laughing and I swear I´ll chew you!

The door opens.

Tiffany: Kitty? Are you in here?

Francis rushes back under the bed.

Tiffany: Kitty, come out, come out wherever you are…

Pen: It was nice knowing you. I think next time we meet I´ll call you Francesca.
Cat: I hate you!
Pen: Ha! Ha! Hey!

Tiffany: Oh look, such a cute pen.
Pen: Let go of me…
Tiffany: I think I´ll add you to my collection.

The cat exhales in relief when Tiffany stops looking for him and exits the room.


Francis is resting in his bed. Tiffany has left with her mom and the cat can finally relax once more.

Cat: Finally, silence.

The Pen comes along.

Pen: Francis, help!
Cat: what? What´s wrong?

Francis takes one good look at the pen and starts laughing hysterically.

Cat: Ha! HA! Ha! Well, hello there, Candy! Nice to see you again.
Pen: Shut up stupid!
Cat: told you she was a demon.
Pen: Yeah, yeah… I know. You were right.

Cat: I´m sorry, what was that? I was what?
Pen: You were right okay! She truly was a hell-spawn.
Cat: Told you!

Pen: Yes, yes… I just thought…
Cat: You thought she would only mess with me because I´m cute and fluffy.
Pen: You´re obnoxious and conceited.

Cat: Ha! Well, goodnight Candy.
Pen: night Francesca.
Cat (annoyed): My name is Francis!
Pen: yeah, yeah…

The end!

2016_Joana Teixeira


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