The Drunken cat and the possessed pen!_episode 49

The Pen shows up, only to find Francis, the cat, frozen in place.

Pen: Hey there kitty cat, what´s up?

The cat remains in place without uttering a word.

Pen: I´m talking to you, you rude cat!

Not getting a response from Francis, the Pen circles around to find him petrified.

Pen: what´s the matter with you?

The cat signals the Pen with his eyes.

Pen: Oh Hell! Where did you come from?

No response.

The Pen turns to Francis.

Pen: Kitty, that´s a rat.
Cat: I can see that stupid!
Pen: You´re the one who´s stupid!

Cat: You…
Pen:  You know, you´re supposed to hunt it, kill it, and if it’s up your alley, eat it!

Francis gives the Pen the most disgusted look he can muster.

The rat decides to approach the two (cat and pen).

Pen: Back of rodent!
Cat: Pen.
Pen: What?
Cat: Let´s back away slowly…

Pen: wrecked cat, why don´t you just kill it?
Cat: don´t be ridiculous! Can´t you see the size of that thing? What if it bites me?
Pen: You really are one useless cat aren´t you?

Cat: I´m not useless! Doesn´t mean I´m suicidal.
Pen: Suicidal? It´s a rat! You´re a cat!
Cat: so what?
Pen: so hiss at it or something!

Cat: How the hell do I do that?
Pen: You really are useless!
Cat: If you´re so brave why don´t you go up to it and do something?
Pen: No way! What if it bites me?

Cat: Oh, but it´s okay if it bites me?
Pen: You´re like three times his size! You´ll live! Me on the other hand, I´ll die, broken or something!

The rat decides to interrupt.

Rat: If you ladies don´t mind me interrupting…
Cat: you can talk?
Pen: you can see me?
Cat: you can see this pen?

Rat: yes, and yes. I can see this marvelous pen.  Don´t worry dear, I won´t bite you.
Pen: You won´t?
Cat: Did you just call this pen from hell marvelous?

Pen: seriously? That´s what you´re worried about?
Rat: it´s a very nice Pen, quite exquisite actually.
Pen: See? Finally someone who can appreciate such beauty! Thank you Mr. Rat.
Rat: Please, call me Raul!

Pen: Pleased to meet you Raul!
Rat: The pleasure´s mine dear.
Cat: I´ve just stepped into the Twilight Zone haven´t I?
Rat: I´m sorry kitty…

Cat (upset, interrupting): It´s Francis and I´m a boy!
Pen: Male, he means he´s male. Hard to tell, I know, with all the drama.
Cat: shut up stupid!
Pen: You´re the one who´s stupid, stupid!

Rat: I´m sorry for the confusion. I apologize.
Cat: That´s alright. What are you doing in my house anyways? How did you get in?
Rat: Door was open. I was looking for food. I apologize for the intrusion. It seems I´m a bit lost. If one of you lovely ladies…

Cat: I´m a boy!
Pen: He means male.
Rat: Again, I apologize. If you could show me the way out I´d be very appreciated.

Cat: of course, follow me.
Rat: good day Miss Pen.
Pen: Good day Mr. Raul.

Francis shows Raul, the rat, the back door so the friendly rodent can exit his house.

He then comes back to meet the Pen.

Cat: That was weird.
Pen: He was nice, unlike you.
Cat: You didn´t find that weird?
Pen: What?

Cat: He could see you?
Pen: Now that you mention it…
Cat: I thought I was the only one that could see you.
Pen: No. I mean Amelia and Bianca were able to see me as well.

Cat: Oh yeah! I´d forgotten about that.
Pen: still, it is weird!
Cat: Yeah, I mean… Oh no!
Pen: what?

Cat: the magic milk!
Pen: what about it?

Francis runs off to the kitchen to find a broken bottle of “magic milk” on the floor, minus the “milk”.

Cat: oh, for the love of…
Pen: So that´s how he was able to see me.
Cat: Crap!

The Pen breaks out laughing.

Cat: What´s so funny?
Pen: well, you showed the rat his way out instead of killing it and eating it.

Cat: What´s your point?
Pen: If you had acted like a normal cat he probably have tasted like your magic milk.
Cat: That´s disgusting!

Pen: Ha! Ha! Ha! You really are one wrecked cat!
Cat: and you are one Pen from hell!
Pen: Love you stink ass!

The end!

2016_Joana Teixeira.


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